Sex and Pornography Addiction

Pornography addiction and sex addiction are two of the fastest growing addictions in the U.S.  Exact numbers are not known but it is estimated that more than 16 million people in the U.S. suffer from compulsive sexual behavior.

Professionals in the field of addiction sometimes note the distinction between an addiction with a physical dependence, characterized by symptoms of withdrawal, and an addiction that is based on psychological dependence.  Both a sexual addiction and pornography addiction are psychological addictions.  Addictions to sex and pornography are found in all levels of society, in all levels of education, in all professions, and in both men and women.  In fact is appears that over a third of sex addicts are women.

Many sex addicts and pornography addicts say their unhealthy behaviors started with limited behaviors such as masturbation, visiting a strip bar, occasionally viewing pornography, or engaging in an affair or other risky sexual behavior.  However, the true addict finds that this limited behavior has progressed to increasingly uncomfortable and often risky and compulsive behavior.

There are several key factors common to sex addiction and pornography addiction.  First is the obsessive nature of the addictive behavior.  Two other key factors are the powerlessness that the addict feels to control their behavior and the rationalization the addict uses to explain and justify acting out.  The feelings of being powerless over a compulsive behavior and rationalizing the behaviors often result in the addict's life becoming unmanageable. The addict acts out the addiction and then often experiences guilt, shame, confusion, and feelings of hopelessness and self-loathing.

If you have a sex  addiction or pornography addiction you will typically consume a great deal of time and energy centered around sexual thoughts, fantasies, and behaviors. As pressure builds you become more preoccupied with sexual thoughts.  You then engage in behaviors where you search for sexual stimulation. This is followed by the compulsive sexual behavior.  After acting out you may experience feelings of hopelessness, powerlessness, or despair and, after a while, in order to escape these negative feelings, you again  have sexual thoughts and fantasies, spend time and energy becoming preoccupied with these thoughts and fantasies, and then again act out and, in so doing, begin the addictive cycle all over again.

Sex addicts and pornography addicts often try to stop their addictive behavior and may be able to temporarily control their behavior.  However, an addict who tries to permanently stop the addiction on their own is usually not successful.  Typically, without professional intervention and help, a sex addiction or pornography addiction will grow progressively worse.

In treating my clients who have a sex addiction or addiction to pornography, I typically help the then to develop specific behavior patterns to avoid the addictive stimuli, explore the factors that led them to embrace unhealthy addictive sources of pleasure, and then help them to develop health ways to find satisfaction. In general, therapeutic approaches include traditional psychotherapy, cognitive therapy, reality therapy, and behavioral therapy.

Spiritual-based methods of treatment can often provide help.  Well developed spiritually based treatment programs include Sex Addicts Anonymous, Sexaholics Anonymous, and Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous that are based on the 12-step system of Alcoholics Anonymous. Other groups that provide similar treatment include LifeRing Secular Recovery and Smart Recovery.  Group therapy and the use of medication have also been effective.

For more information about sex addiction and pornography addiction, please click on the linked websites listed below.

"If you really want help dealing with your feelings and emotions, changing your behavior, and improving your life, I will be happy to help you.  I am available almost any time and any place.  You can call me directly and there is no cost or obligation for the initial telephone consultation.  Or you can reach me by email.  I look forward to the possibility of helping you to improve your life."   Dr. Vince Berger